Everything Old is New Again

It's upfront week, and NBC has announced their new fall lineup. There's not a lot of new shows here....and the ones that are new? Well, let's just say I'm feeling a bit like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.

Desperate to try and steal ABC's viewers of LOST, this fall NBC offers Crusoe, based on the novel from...1719. Also coming soon: Moby Dick, the series. Just kidding, ANIMAL PLANET!!!!! Don't get any ideas.

Also, on NBC, perhaps learning nothing from the Bionic failure of The Bionic Woman, Knight Rider is set to make a comeback, but it doesn't look like David Hasselhoff has much of a role, if any.

I don't know about this...I would not hassle the Hoff!

My Own Worst Enemy is a new spy drama starring Christian Slater and the perfect title if the series were written by his ex-girlfriends where he plays two dudes in one; one lives in the suburbs and the other is a spy, yet they are both in the same body. Which I guess means "Schizo-Spy" wasn't available as a title. It does seem worth checking out, but what IS it about Christian Slater these days that makes him seem...so...oily?

Lastly, ER is coming back for its 15th and final season. Will they lure Clooney back? Will Mark Greene rise from the dead? Will John Stamos continue to look hot?

Stay tuned. And hopefully, we won't find out it was all just some kind of dream...elsewhere.

The Name Game

TV People spend a heck of a lot of time sweating what their shows are going to be named. Just recently, I ranted about the green-a-palooza that is Planet Green. With the onslaught of new programming announcements, I took another spin to see some of the best (and worst).

Oh boy... there are some good ones.

On TLC, there's "This is Why You're Single", which is what my friends say to me once a week an intervention show for long-time singles.

On Animal Planet, "Stray to Hey" is about abandoned stray dogs who get new homes after getting a makeover. Wait, WHAT? Dogs getting a makeover? God I love that title, but if Carson Kressley is involved I am going to be concerned.

I actually should start watching Animal Planet. They already have "Escape to Chimp Eden" and "Groomer Has It". I have no idea what these shows are about, but the names alone are like, totally awesome.

Now, when I read in Variety that "Would You Rather" was a newly announced show hosted by Howie Mandel "where people have to decide between two equally unpleasant options", imagine my dismay.

"Would You Rather" is NOT a Bachelor-style dating show starring Dan Rather as the name would suggest.

Damn... and here I was hoping Dan might be our new Rock of Love.