57 Channels (And Nothin’ On)

It's still a desert out there.

In an effort to be hip, I resorted to watching some of the MTV Movie Awards, but when it took me a minute or two to place High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens, I began to feel old. Cut me some slack though...this is an awards ceremony that not only nominated Bride Wars for an acting award (really, MTV?) but where MILEY CYRUS beat out Bruce Springsteen for best song from a movie.

It was at that point that I changed the channel and worried that the pop culture apocalypse was near.

Watching I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here the following night did nothing to ease these fears, but at least it made me feel a little better about myself. Seeing all of these "stars" with makeup-free faces greasier than if they were working the fry-o-later at Mickey D's gave me more joy than I anticipated.

Spencer and Heidi on the other hand...until last night, I'd prided myself on successfully avoiding The Hills and any affiliated nonsense.

Seeing those morons speak for the first time made me mad. Mad at them for being morons, mad at myself for being complicit with NBC's attempts to cater to the lowest common denominator, mad that I am indeed being sucked into Speidi's web of lies and tuning in to see if they quit the show or not.

And mad that I am now looking forward to The Real Housewives of New Jersey tonight as a quasi-legitimate source of entertainment. What else am I gonna watch...the series finale of According to Jim?

Yep, still on the air (who knew?) and the info button reveals (*finale spoiler alert*) that Jim chokes on a shrimp puff.

Now, if only someone would feed one to Speidi?