The Feminine Mystique

I know I'm setting my gender back about a hundred (ok, a thousand) years but feminism be damned, I'm starting to love Rock of Love 2.

Why, you ask?

I love it for the little things, like, I love that whoever cast this show carefully chose girls with the fakest sounding (or at least, fakest spelled) names on the planet. As in...Destiney, Jackye, Inna and my favorite, Ambre. No, it still SOUNDS like Amber, but it's spelled Ambre...like it should rhyme with hombre (Hombre was also the name of the cologne Joey sold on Friends. Why can I remember this yet I am unable to name former presidents in sequential order with any degree of reliability? I digress...).

I love it for Bret Michael's fake hair that looks like he skinned it off one of those giant make-me-pretty Barbie Doll heads I had as a kid.

I love that these women have the emotional maturity of corrupted teen girls, and the look of tranny hookers in lockup.

Mostly, I just laugh along with Bret. He seems totally in on the joke, has great comedic timing, and God bless him, what single guy WOULDN'T sign up for a show whose sole focus is single girls one-upping the other in sluttiness to get with him?

Ever so briefly, though, this show tugged at my heartstrings and Bret was starting to look like a potential nominee for my Norma Desmond awards. When he busted out that guitar to sing "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" those girls were predictably in awe of Bret. I was too...in 1988.

And isn't that what makes us (well, some of us) so obsessed with the celebreality phenomenon? Don't we all cling a little (or a lot) to our glory days as we get older? Is F. Scott Fitzgerald right...are there no second acts?

I'm not sure, but, I think Bret will be ok. In this most recent episode, he made the girls perform a "talent" to win him over. This included a girl ironing in a bikini. He also took some girls 4-wheeling.

This might not be his second act, but he's sure enjoying the ride.