Talk Soup

Lots going on around the talk dial. Larry King's Out. Piers Morgan is in. And David Letterman did his very first appearance on that super estrogen fest you love to hate, The View.

You'll have to wait till November 8th to catch Conan on TBS.

Back to Letterman for a sec. I've always been TEAM LETTERMAN ever since the Leno/Letterman late night wars (remember when that poor actor dude had to don a prosthetic chin in the MOVIE about this? Eek.). Let's be honest, the Letterman/Leno spat is old news, but I can't help it, the Conan dustup got me all interested again.

And it got Babs interested, too. God bless her, she got right in there and asked Dave about it and it's pretty juicy. Dave even impersonates Leno. Love it!

So how come the ABC marketing machine isn't putting this clip everywhere? Boooo ABC. Bad marketing. Bad.

Instead, the clip they are pushing everywhere is Dave and Barbara talking about their heart surgeries. Yes, I'm glad they didn't croak but if I wanted to hear about heart stuff I'd re-watch the Boston Med episodes still clogging up my DVR.

Or maybe a Denny Duquette rerun on Grey's Anatomy.

Well, some dude had a heart and cared enough to upload the Leno bashing, so you can watch it here...even if it's VIDEOTAPED off the tv. Oh dear, this is worse sound quality than when I used to hold my cassette recorder up to the tv to record that Joanie loves Chachi song. Anyhoo, the juicy stuff starts around :30 in.


Or, if you've got some time to kill, you can sit through the whole episode all bright and shiny on ABC's website. Hmm, maybe they're smarter than I thought.

As for Piers Morgan replacing suspenders spokesperson Larry King, I guess he's ok. I would've preferred someone with a little more spunk. Lately my choice for every tv host vacancy seems to be Bret Michaels or Chris Harrison. Bandana or Fantasy Suite?

You decide.

J on the down Lo

I love those big pop culture moments, the ones that take place on late night talk and get you running to the water cooler the next day.

There's the vintage: Drew Barrymore flashing Letterman....Hugh Grant gets caught with a hooker and tells all on Jay Leno ("What the hell were you thinking?").

There's the recent: David Letterman grilling Paris Hilton about prison (just kill me now that I am, again, mentioning Paris Hilton).

And then there's now.

When I heard that Jennifer Lopez was going to be on Letterman, I thought, "She's going to announce she is preggers! Finally!" But, sadly, I was robbed. She and Dave did do the subtle baby dance discussion, but in the end...it was nuthin'.

I hate being wrong.

Well, announcing a pregnancy on Letterman didn't really work out so well for Britney, so, maybe Jenny from the Block was worried about a jinx. Or maybe she's not even pregnant.

None of this is really my problem. The real problem is...NOW what am I gonna talk about at the water cooler???

I miss Bennifer.

Letterman's Ladies

It's been said that back in the old days, young comedians appearing for the first time on Johnny Carson would hope and pray that they'd get invited to sit on the couch after their stand-up routine. A simple nod from Johnny was considered approval and could change careers.

These days, I've noticed another barometer of success on late night TV when it comes to Carson disciple David Letterman. I'm not sure this changes careers, or has an impact on anyone other than JUST ME, but now, maybe you will play this little game along with me when you watch.

I am of the opinion that when it comes to his female guests, it's very simple to determine if Dave likes you or not. If Dave likes you, then the interview is capped off with a kiss to the hand.

I've gotten good at this. I can usually guess as I watch how it's going to go. On Tuesday night, Kate Walsh came on to promote Private Practice, but because she yammered away on a rehearsed story about her wedding, Dave really didn't get to engage with her. A little research showed me that this is exactly what happened last time (only the story was about a contractor, not her wedding). So, I knew it was coming...the hand kiss snub. Sorry Kate, Dave's just not that into you.

But, surprisingly, he seems to have a soft spot for the wild gals, the troubled kids. Lindsay? Always gonna get a kiss. Drew Barrymore's a legend there, but, that might be because of her infamous flashing incident. Even Paris Hilton. PARIS HILTON! She's so annoying and yet, Dave kind of digs it cuz it gives him something to play off of.

But don't take my word for it. Compare Kate Walsh's interview from last night and the pre-prison interview of Paris from earlier this year [I forgive you in advance if you cannot sit through nine minutes of Paris Hilton to help me prove my point].

Paris is also going to be on this Friday from an appearance taped earlier in the week. Rumor has it she was really pissed that Dave gave her such a hard time...but to my ears that sounds like an interview worthy of a hand kiss to me!